Universal Members

Feelings and Needs: What’s Underneath?

A worksheet with six need categories and a log linking situations, feelings, underlying needs and ways to meet them or make requests.

1-page fillable PDF · US Letter (prints on A4) · Communication · Psychoeducation

Key facts

Approach / concern
Universal
Technique
Communication · Psychoeducation
Format
Fillable PDF, 1 page (US Letter / A4)
Access
Pro and Advanced plans (3-day free trial)
For
Licensed clinicians to use with clients
Updated
October 2026

What is the Feelings and Needs: What’s Underneath??

Linking feelings to underlying needs is central to Nonviolent Communication and many emotion-focused approaches. Identifying needs supports self-care and clear, non-blaming requests.

Why it works

Nonviolent Communication proposes that feelings arise from met or unmet needs (Rosenberg, 2015). Self-determination theory identifies universal psychological needs for autonomy, competence and relatedness (Deci & Ryan, 2000).

When to use it

  • Emotional awareness work
  • Couples and family communication
  • Assertiveness
  • Teens and adults

How to use it in session

  1. Review need categories.
  2. Choose a situation.
  3. Name the feeling.
  4. Identify the need.
  5. Plan how to meet it or ask.

Clinician tips

  • Pair with the feelings wheel.
  • Distinguish needs from strategies.
  • Practise requests in session.

Worked example

Situation: partner on phone at dinner. Feeling: lonely. Need: connection. Ask: “Could we have phone-free dinners?”

Sharing with clients

Members can download the PDF to print or email, or copy a private client link from the download box. Your client opens the link and downloads the worksheet on any device. No client account is needed, and nothing your client writes is stored on TherapyAid.

Frequently asked questions

What’s the difference between a need and a want?

Needs are universal (like connection); strategies are specific ways to meet them.

Can needs conflict?

Yes. Naming them helps find solutions that meet more needs at once.

References

Rosenberg, M. B. (2015). Nonviolent communication: A language of life (3rd ed.). PuddleDancer Press.

Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000). The “what” and “why” of goal pursuits: Human needs and the self-determination of behavior. Psychological Inquiry, 11(4), 227-268.

This worksheet is an educational tool for use by, or under the guidance of, a licensed or registered mental-health professional. It is not a diagnostic instrument or a substitute for clinical judgement. If a client is in crisis in Canada, call or text 9-8-8 or call 9-1-1.