Starting a Conversation About Sex
A sexual communication worksheet with four steps for starting a conversation about sex, a draft of what to say and a plan for worries.
1-page fillable PDF · US Letter (prints on A4) · Sexual communication
- Approach / concern
- Sex Therapy
- Technique
- Sexual communication
- Format
- Fillable PDF, 1 page (US Letter / A4)
- Access
- Advanced plan
- For
- Licensed clinicians to use with clients
- Updated
- October 2026
Key facts
What is the Starting a Conversation About Sex?
Sexual communication is linked to sexual and relationship satisfaction. Gentle, appreciative and specific requests make conversations safer and more effective.
Why it works
A meta-analysis found sexual communication is associated with sexual function and satisfaction (Mallory et al., 2019). Gentle start-up improves conflict conversations (Gottman & Silver, 2015).
When to use it
- Couples avoiding sexual topics
- Desire or preference differences
- After changes in intimacy
- Individual preparation
How to use it in session
- Choose timing.
- Draft appreciation and wishes.
- Plan invitation.
- Address worries.
- Debrief afterwards.
Clinician tips
- Practise in session first.
- Avoid criticism of past performance.
- Expect awkwardness; use humour.
Worked example
Sharing with clients
Members can download the PDF to print or email, or copy a private client link from the download box. Your client opens the link and downloads the worksheet on any device. No client account is needed, and nothing your client writes is stored on TherapyAid.
Frequently asked questions
When is the best time to talk about sex?
A relaxed time outside the bedroom, not during conflict.
What if my partner gets defensive?
Pause, reassure them, and return to it later or with a therapist.
References
Mallory, A. B., Stanton, A. M., & Handy, A. B. (2019). Couples’ sexual communication and dimensions of sexual function: A meta-analysis. Journal of Sex Research, 56(7), 882-898.
Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2015). The seven principles for making marriage work (Rev. ed.). Harmony Books.
This worksheet is an educational tool for use by, or under the guidance of, a licensed or registered mental-health professional. It is not a diagnostic instrument or a substitute for clinical judgement. If a client is in crisis in Canada, call or text 9-8-8 or call 9-1-1.
