Talking About Intimacy & Desire
A couples sex-therapy worksheet for privately reflecting on closeness, preferences, barriers and wishes, then sharing with agreed ground rules.
1-page fillable PDF · US Letter (prints on A4) · Sexual communication
- Approach / concern
- Sex Therapy
- Technique
- Sexual communication
- Format
- Fillable PDF, 1 page (US Letter / A4)
- Access
- Advanced plan
- For
- Licensed clinicians to use with clients
- Updated
- October 2026
Key facts
What is the Talking About Intimacy & Desire?
Sexual communication, the ability to discuss preferences, needs and concerns about intimacy, is a key component of sexual and relationship wellbeing. This worksheet helps partners prepare for and structure a respectful conversation.
Why it works
A meta-analysis found that better sexual communication is associated with higher sexual satisfaction and better sexual function across several domains (Mallory et al., 2019).
When to use it
- Couples with mismatched desire
- Intimacy changes after childbirth, illness or menopause
- Couples who avoid talking about sex
- Sex therapy homework
How to use it in session
- Each partner completes the sheet privately.
- Agree on ground rules and a calm time.
- Take turns sharing and summarizing.
- Identify one small shared step.
- Process the conversation in session.
Clinician tips
- Avoid starting this conversation in the bedroom or after a rejection.
- Normalize differences in desire.
- Screen for pain, medical issues and coercion.
Worked example
Sharing with clients
Members can download the PDF to print or email, or copy a private client link from the download box. Your client opens the link and downloads the worksheet on any device. No client account is needed, and nothing your client writes is stored on TherapyAid.
Frequently asked questions
What if talking about sex makes us argue?
Pause and return later, or bring the conversation into a session with a sex or couples therapist.
Do we have to share everything we write?
No. Share what feels comfortable. The reflection itself is valuable.
References
Mallory, A. B., Stanton, A. M., & Handy, A. B. (2019). Couples’ sexual communication and dimensions of sexual function: A meta-analysis. The Journal of Sex Research, 56(7), 882-898.
This worksheet is an educational tool for use by, or under the guidance of, a licensed or registered mental-health professional. It is not a diagnostic instrument or a substitute for clinical judgement. If a client is in crisis in Canada, call or text 9-8-8 or call 9-1-1.
